How many times does a horn player laugh at a joke? - Once, when he hears it.

How many times does a trumpet player laugh at a joke? - Twice, once when he hears it and again when he gets it.

How many times does a tuba player laugh at a joke - Three times, once when he hears it, once when it's explained to him and once when he gets it.

How many times does a percussionist laugh at a joke? - He doesn't-he starts a fight because he thinks everyone is laughing at him.

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