On the day of the local match, the captain was talking to one of his men. 'Look, here's a pound,' he said. 'Go out and buy a new ball or something. Anything that'll help us win.'

The match began and the captain noticed that the same old ball was being used.

He called his man over. 'What did you do with the pound?' he asked. 'Well, you said anything to help us win.'

'Yes.'

'I gave it to the umpire.'

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